when you hear the word despair and you’re just like:
*knocks you out with a calculator* bet you weren’t counting on that
please don’t look at my computer screen if ur sitting beside me
im gonna bookmark this and go and reblog it the next time someone does this to me
my phone battery died faster than my dreams
dont you hate when you accidentally tie one shoe tighter than the other and you have to redo your entire life?
hey guys, the krusty krab 2 opens today!
one time my sister was working at home depot and got called down to help handle an outrageously angry man returning a lawnmower and it was our dad
i went to a new school when i started second grade and i still remember what my parents said to me as they dropped me off on my first day at the new school: “dont do your yoshi impression, it’s weird and you’ll make no friends.”
when u accidently type me instead of my
i’m gonna reblog sad tablo bee every time it’s on my dash
When I die, put this tweet on my tombstone.
Should have got an Oscar
My vehicle of choice